The Power of Control is More than You Think
The often missed message of Epictetus’ famous phrase
This week’s Meditation at a glance:
Epictetus advised that there were some things within our control and others that are not. But this phrase often is interpreted to create two categories of things in our control and things outside our control. But what Epictetus meant actually goes deeper than just understanding control.
Epictetus’ famous dictum begins as follows:
“Some things in the world are up to us, while others are not. Up to us are our faculties of judgment - motivation, desire, and aversion - in short, everything that is our own doing. Not up to us are our body and property, our reputations, and our official positions - in short, everything that is not our own doing.”
Often, people read this and interpret it to mean that we, our individual selves, have no control over outside things (things not within our control) and should instead focus on the things that are within our control.
And this is partially true, but more importantly, it is the power of our decisions, the choice to choose whether or not we will do something. It is not just determining whether or not something is within our control, it is about understanding whether or not something is within our control and then, when it is, deciding to take action and do something.
It is, in essence, the power of choice.
“He who refuses to embrace a unique opportunity,” William James once wrote, “loses the prize as surely as if he had tried and failed."
It is within our power to choose whether or not we will take up opportunities, whether or not we will act in situations wherein we have the power to act. And this is important because this is where we build ourselves. This is where we make a commitment to ourselves. We must first recognize the power to choose, and then we must commit ourselves to the action—we must determine what we need to do and then do it.
Like we discussed last week, when Louis Zamperini was knocked to the ground during the race, he had the choice to stay there and admit defeat knowing he could not win, or he could get back up and finish the race, regardless of what happened.
It wasn’t within Zamperini’s control to get knocked over, that happened and he had a decision to make—get back up and finish the race or walk off the track. He chose to get up and finish the race, coming within inches of winning.
“If you can't control your attitude, forget it,” he would later write.
Our attitudes are our choices. If we tell ourselves something is pointless, then it is, because we are instilling a lack of control over our destiny by choosing not to act.
It is these opportunities that make us, the ones that appear when everything seems to have crumbled, that build us up and teach us the most important lessons in life.
As Marcus Aurelius once had to remind himself:
“Just pay attention, and resolve to live up to your own expectations. In everything. And when faced with a choice, remember: our business is with things that really matter.”
We will fall, we will not always win, and we will sometimes make the wrong decisions. But they are decisions we make and live by.
We will not always get it right. There will be times where we reflect back and realize we had control over situations but in the moment didn’t realize so. Or that we had control over an event but never acted upon our choice to do something about it. What matters is recognizing these moments, reflecting on them and bringing your attention to them.
As Epictetus said, persist and resist. In other words, it is not about perfection, it is about progress. It is not about getting it right every time—that will never happen. Rather, it is about improving constantly, getting better at understanding ourselves and building our mental faculty to understand the events within our lives.
Three Bullet Summary:
There are things that we can control (our actions) and things we cannot control (outside events)
We have the decision to choose to act and choose the proper way to act.
We will not always make the right decisions but through reflection and practice, we will get better at understanding ourselves and our actions.
Thank you again for reading and I hope you found this useful. Please feel free to heart, comment, or ask questions about this post. Suggestions are always appreciated and considered.
Until next week,
D.A. DiGerolamo